Be the change

changeisgood

I came across this quote the other day and was caught by its simplicity:  Be the change you want to see.  So, I did some digging to find authorship.  Apparently it’s anonymous as there’s no real evidence linking to Ghandi‘s actual writings, which is typically who we credit it to.  This is a little closer to his words

“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.”

Either way, it‘s a good quote and has merit because there are some interesting nuggets of truth in it.

But stripped Himself [of all privileges and rightful dignity], so as to assume the guise of a servant (slave), in that He became like men and was born a human being. -Phil 2:7

God wanted us to change, so Jesus became human and lived a human life to show us how to do it.  God didn’t just say, be human and these rules will help you.  He demonstrated it by becoming the change He told us to be.

BE & DO

How would you like your husband to be towards you?  Be the first to ignite that change.  Whatever it is you want to see more of in your marriage, don’t wait for it to be done and then reciprocate.  Plan to be the first to do exactly that.  Do that change.

Here is a simple rule of thumb for behaviour: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and DO it for them! -Luke 6:31 (emphasis added)

Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you BE kind. -Luke 6:36 (emphasis added)

GIVE

This one’s a bonus, there’s a reward promised!  The trick though, is to start the ball rolling.  There’s a loose paraphrase of Ecclesiastes 11:1 that says, “if you cast your bread on the water it’ll come back buttered.”  Whatever you want to receive in your marriage, be the first to give it.

Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity. -Luke 6:38

Change is good, but getting there is painful.  In order for Jesus to be the change for the world, He had to first struggle to chose it; then be obedient to the point of death to give it.  (Luke 22:42-44; Philippians 2:8)  God exacted a price; it was the life of Christ.  To say that it was painfully hard for Jesus, would be an incredible understatement.  We’ve been told straight up by God, that His purpose is to re-shape us into the likeness of Christ.  And we know, in order to share in Christ’s glory we will share in the suffering too.  If it’s me who sees the need for change in my marriage then I need to be that change.

 

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4 comments

  1. Great post. Yes, indeed, go first!

    One caution is to be aware of the way in which you go first. Loving your spouse in the same way in which you want to see love expressed often doesn’t work because men and women tend to have different ideas on what love looks like. By all means love with the same intensity, the same kindness, the same generosity as you want to have expressed to you, but not necessarily in the exact same way.

    1. So true, thanks for that Scott! Female expressions are indeed very different from masculine ones. From experience, it doesn’t matter how great the intensity is if you are speaking the wrong love language.

  2. I like this, someone said something similar to me lately, “strive to bless, not impress” that has been sticking in my head.

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