Hideous sickness is not just on the flesh. I would venture to say that the most putrefying sores are found within us … in our hearts.
A rotting heart is proved in me when I see my own condition as cleaner than that of my husband; or not as deadly as his. And when I am too blind to the fact that I am also infected by the same virus and can’t see that my symptoms are just different than his.
“Oh Lord, let me forgive those who sin differently than I do.”
Should I run from my husband’s illness because his problems interfere with my life? Should I run from my marriage because his choices directly affect me for better and for worse? Should I run from my commitments because things have changed and he makes my life, at certain seasons, difficult and even painful?
Or, would my own healing be found in a mental shift; a paradigm shift. What makes me think that God is giving me the right to be the one who gets to throw the first stone?
Shouldn’t we wait patiently, while the Lord works to heal illness in a brother … just like God is patient while Jesus heals us?
Or is there more grace for me than for my brother?